and the proof is in the
pudding posting. back to The Bruthuhs Deez, Dillydally, Defer & Delay were these four wee kitties who lived out their lives in — no,
wait... that's a whole nother story so i'm starting over — yeah, no backsies — but before i forget,
big thanks to
AndreaUrbanFox for teh funny above as well as the darling dudes over at
Trollcats for the love that enabled her. somewhere along the line, someone (Andrea?) gave it the title:
'Kids, this is why adults don't want you to touch them', but as usual, i digress, which totally fits into the same exact vein as my hungover hesitation of the other day as well as my dillydally-delaying the deferable. *whispers* and if, by post's end, y'all aren't driven batshit-crazy
y'know: like me, i'll have to admit dreaded defeat: the accusations are accurate and
i'm losing i've lost my tenuous
hold on reality touch. pity, that. }-(
editor's note: holy hell, i've written some utter shite in my time but never have i experienced this World Without End going on and On and
ON right now... all in the interests of Procrastination
Nation and used to the dirtiest demented, deplorable, depraved disadvantage. waitaminnit...
Logorreah's like diarreah of the mouf — both kinds, right?
Linguistically, it's
'an excessive flow of words; prolixity; wordiness; tumidity' and
Psychologically, it's
'a communication disorder resulting in incoherent talkativeness'. *cough* 'guilty as charged, yer honor'. *snigger* wait — i gotta remember to add to my FAQs. anyway, here's the score: coherence: nil /
confusion: well, see for yourself:
this is cause my shit — the post i wrote whilst ill — is so incredibly fucked-up (even for me): depressing and pretty much deathly
devoted deranged. then again, in all actuallity, it's more daftly distressing than technically depressing, but still... enough people think i'm way too off-the-wall already — hang on; why use a euphemism like 'off-the-wall' when the more appropriate 'fucking insane' will do?
OK, enough think i'm fucking insane already
(guess what? they're right), so in the interests of any modicum of self-preservation that still might be rolling round in my head, i'm entertaining second thoughts about putting the damned thing up here. then again, after all the bullshit build-up, it's bound to disappoint so, like... why bother? confused again? yup — me three. *wack* and in the very rare case your discomfiture's lacking, i'd advise the only proper thing to do:
sorry, i keep forgetting i'm American and being as distinctly direct as i am's like, totally not on; it's not considered polite here. i do hope this's betterer (in the sense of 'more easily palatable to Brits' oh-so-delicate sensibilities') cause even though it's the same exact message, the cute kitty below makes it more bearable. or so i've been told).
not-so fun-fact: this pussyfooting around (no pun intended) is totally beyond me and prolly always will be cause although i
bullshit Bulwer-Lytton my way through any act of writing, my meatspace manner's always been *cough*
'in-your-face' (as this British dude once
moaned to told me). in the States, it's known as being 'direct' and 'to-the-point' and is looked upon as a positive characteristic, at least when tact over-rides brutal honesty. but now i'm touching upon things about which i know nothing (like social graces) and though that never stopped me before — wait: hey, look over there —> it's some ADD!:
regarding any Bulwer-Lyttoning in which i might indulge (hah! —> 'might'), someone once called me (get
this),
'The Princess of Purple Prose'. *snigger* now i dunno about any princess, *shudder*
as fucking IF but he was spot-on with the purple prose stuff; that is,
'...passages, or sometimes entire literary works, written in prose so overly extravagant, ornate, or flowery as to break the flow and draw attention to itself...' once again, 'guilty as charged' (and this is me caring). but in my own defence, i must say that my vivid imagination is so convincing most times that i forget i'm not someone like Charles Dickens and paid by the word.
moving right along and back to me telling yiz all to Shut The Fuck Up, i'm like totally kidding, of course. to lapse into
LOL-speak —
'a dialect which parodies the poor grammar typically attributed to Internet slang' —
O RLY? yup, rilly — i
am (kidding, as well as tawkin to myself but we won't go there).BTW, this is a prime example of what i call 'a nothing post' and so, in the spirit of wasting
more time and
even more bandwidth, when i took the next photo of Hunter, the caption occurred in a flash of tritenessity, repulsive though it may be. *preens* yeah, i'm tryna change the subject so why bother asking? *whispers* right, i hear
dead people voices as well but shhhh... don't tell anyone. and y'all know where the door is, right?
right? *points
and LOLs* anyway, heeeere's Hunter! *in an
Ed McMahon voice*
oh, wow —
he's dead...
'I did not know that' *in a John Goodman voice*. if you're so inclined,
listen to him — Goodman, not McMahon — as Walter here in one of the funniest bits from Lebowski and make sure you check Walter's, i mean, John Goodman's intonation of the very last line:
The Dude:
'He has emotional problems, man'.Walter:
'You mean, beyond pacifism?'The Dude:
'He's fragile, very fragile'.Walter:
'I did not know that'.fun-fact: above image's illustrating Walter going
'Eight-year olds, Dude' to the Dude. not-so fun-fact: as all who know me know (so much so, my Lebowski Tourette's coming outta their ears), i'm hard-pressed to choose the funniest of teh funny from the film. one night when still living in Germany, i began to list em whilst watching but after like ten, twenty minutes or so, i found myself copying every damn line and since i get so easily discouraged, it was then i left off. BTW,
the script's online; please hand in a synopsis of at least ten double-spaced typed pages by 08,00 tomorrow morning or points off.
whoa, this past half hour of time-wasting was FUN
if your idea of fun is writing whatever pops into your dumbass head and passing it off as your journal or diary or notebook or sump'n. and i do — i mean, 'and it is'. well, in truth, i dunno what i mean but that never stopped me from blethering on and on and on in my typically feeble efforts to pass off stream of unconsciousness as real, true deep thinking. what never fails to crack me up is that people actually read me —
amazing... what boring lives they must lead (but i didn't say that and never ever would). now, where was i?
once again, since i have nothing noteworthy to say,
i stoled this from TrollCats, the sole reason being cause the shoe totally fits, if 'shoe' means 'content' which, at the moment it does
even when i hafta force it, as i do when nobody's looking, like now. where am i going with alla this shit? damned if i know cause i'm still disoriented.
confused again, dammit.
hey, i just realised sump'n: there's more than a decent chance that the sheer disjointed, demented nature of this very writty could be due to me not sleeping again (up for two outta the last three nights), even though i went to couch with Hunter (06,30 this AM and i was still awake at 08,00 so i said 'fuck it' and got up). but that doesn't answer Why So Many D-Words?
fastly changing topical gears as only i can, i've turned this into a repository for the motley miscellaneae accumulated over the last few weeks, the oddments and such lying scattered on the pavement of my desktop in a manner that maketh my
OCD boil over.
*dusts off hands with satisfaction having successfully driven off the cliffs of The Danger Zone* speaking of which — the oddments (neither the OCD nor the Danger Zone) — i haven't forgotten
Stoneleigh House, my fave edifice here in the 'hood, though i haven't posted any pics of it lately. and now that's an outright lie cause i took this the other night
and immediately forgot about it.
*whimper* OK, lessee if i can waste any moar of anyone's precious time
(in all seriousity, i'm actually waiting for a communique that just might change my life but i won't get into details cause of Sod and all). right, i took this next of the inside of one of the stalls of the ladies' loo at
The Travellers Inn last time in London. the details of sump'n so relatively insignificant never cease to amaze me and i've spent too-long a time just digging on the original ceramic tiles that line each stall within both men's and women's johns on the upstairs of the pub. no fucking way can i see this in any public toilet in the States but then again, i'm rather biased, to say the very least as well as putting it as nicely as i'm able). dig:
fun-fact a): the day i took above pic i guess i spent too long a time doing so cause one of the waitresses came in to ask — through the door — if i were alright. i immediately came out and showed her the pix on my phone cause i got the distinct feeling she thought i was in there getting high solely based on the longass time i spent within. fun-fact b) the day i took pic above was Guy Fawkes Day on my way to Stevie's new flat for her 5. november party and the last time i was in town. in almost 5,5 years of living in England, i'm in the midst of the longest interval spent away from London — almost three months now. this troubles me muchly. :-(
OK, i've wasted enough of
my your time writing and if yiz're still with me, i salute you. then again, i've always had the sneaking suspicion that people read me to note the ever-increasing amount of train-wreck factor or else, they're looking for clues, band-gossip and whatever other sordidity i sometimes manage to sneak into my posts, mostly days after they've been up. so 'HA-ha!' *in a Nelson Muntz voice* y'all read this for nothing. wait: here, have some cups or sump'n i stoled from Forbidden Planet. ;-)
*to self* finally! Endlich! this ordeal's totally over tonight and good riddance to it. and now, for the moment i've been waiting for all the damn day (and night) so use yer imaginations cause i ain't gonna spell it out for you. oh, why not? gimme a TEE! gimme a HAITCH! and on with the rest. i mean,
'I might be stoopit but I ain't bloody stoopit' *in a Zoe Bell voice* well, akshully i am... though she's not — know whut i mean?
in other news, if i hadda rate this post, this'd be IT:
LOL, just sayin' — i totally callz em as i seez em and i ain't never wrawng. :-)
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